Paloma Faith’s deranged tirade against Ed Sheeran

I don’t usually go in for conspiracy theories. But I have long nurtured the view that Paloma Faith is a psyop – that this alleged singer-songwriter / bloviating activist is actually some kind of plant, put there to demoralise the sensible and gee up the politically deranged. I don’t actually believe this. But still, ask yourself: can you name one Paloma Faith song? Have you ever met a Paloma Faith fan? Of course you haven’t. Her role is purely to dump dumb opinions into your timeline.

Exhibit A is her chastising of Ed Sheeran, who has been branded a ‘genocide denier’ because he doesn’t want to get involved in the Israel-Palestine debate. ‘What Ed Sheeran’s learning the hard way is that… being apolitical is a political act in itself’, Faith told Channel 4 News’s Krishnan Guru-Murthy last night, in her mockney drawl, wearing matching Palestine top and earrings.

The prompt for this was the brouhaha over Sheeran’s arena tour. Woke rapper Macklemore – the lamest MC since Vanilla Ice – was dropped from the supporting line-up after he took to the stage to accuse Israel of ‘genocide’ and several venues threatened to pull out. Despite saying the decision to sack Macklemore was out of his control, and that he’d rather not weigh in on one of the world’s most intractable conflicts, Sheeran has still been accused of being a Zionist shill who should cancel the rest of his dates in solidarity with the Palestinians. Because that of course would solve everything.

Paloma conceded that canning the tour might be tricky for Ed for ‘insurance’ reasons, but nevertheless said it is ‘ideologically’ the right thing to do. She also rebuffed his argument that, as a writer of love songs for preteens, he doesn’t feel the need to blunder into politics. ‘When he said that it really upset me, because there are so many children in Palestine’, thundered Paloma, before adding, incredibly: ‘I say Free Palestine to my children every night. I feel children should be exposed to politics.’

Poor little blighters. Before I call social services, it’s worth reflecting on what Paloma is saying here. Because it has been echoed in many a mental TikTok video over the past 24 hours. Namely, that pop stars aren’t simply duty bound to express an opinion on the big issue of the day, they must express The Opinion. They must toe the ideological line on Palestine or face shaming and lurid accusations of ‘complicity’. Keeping schtum isn’t enough. This is the ‘silence is violence’ slogan of BLM draped in black, white, red and green.

This is a terrible idea, for many reasons. It debases popular culture, turning even teeny-bopper pop concerts into little more than an extended lecture. And it debases politics, dragging discourse down to the level of the mindless celeb platitude. It means no area of life is safe from the diktats of the omnicause – including bed time. This is at least as much of a problem for creative freedom as some pro-Israel figures foolishly trying to fight the rise of Israelophobia with cancel culture.

It’s certainly bad news for Ed Sheeran. Who I must admit I feel sorry for. Yes, he’s a multimillionaire recording artist. But beneath it all, he’s also a Hollister-wearing, gap-year normie. The sort of middle-class lad who can’t help but bust out a guitar at house parties and wishes everyone could just get along. He’s not built for this scratchy, culture-warring age.

More importantly, it’s bad news for the rest of us. The more pop and politics become inseparable, the more we are expected to treat people like Paloma Faith as an authority to be listened to. And I for one cannot handle that. I’d tell her to stick to the music, but is she even a musician at all? I don’t know. I’m just asking questions…