Trans ideology has no place in nurseries

I will always remember the slight alarm I felt when first dropping my children off at nursery. Were the smiley, friendly women just as smiley and friendly when they closed that nursery door?

I am not alone. There are plenty of other things parents have to worry about when their child starts at nursery. Safety ranks high on that list – is the nursery fully prepared for things like my child having an accident or a fire starting? Next comes other children – will my child be impacted negatively by other children who misbehave? Then there’s separation anxiety – is my child going to miss me terribly? Finally, adjustment – will my child adjust to nursery, settle in and have a happy experience?

Sadly, there is now a brand-spanking new fear in town, expressed perfectly by a mother who emailed me recently. In a nutshell, this is what she said:

‘My three-year-old daughter attends a local nursery. She loves to pretend being lots of different characters but mainly she says she wants to play the “mummy” and, almost as frequently, she says that she will be the “daddy” during playtime.

I never thought much of this because children say all sorts. But having seen online how children are being told they might be a different gender or sex, I am inwardly terrified that someone at her nursery might suggest that she is a boy. How should I handle this? Should I approach the nursery?’

She is correct in thinking that make-believe roleplay in children is extremely common. When it comes to fantasy characters, top of the list for children is pretending they are unicorns, pirates, princesses, cowboys and Indians. And when it comes to characters from real life, mummies and daddies, doctors and nurses, teachers, police officers and such like are the most common.

Research shows role-swapping behaviour is not only extremely common, but that it also facilitates a child’s creative abilities, as well as their social development, motor skills and problem-solving abilities. Nearly a hundred years ago, Swiss psychologist Jean Piaget proposed that such creative play was essential to overall child development. Much more recently, Dr Sandra Rust confirmed the vital role of creative play in a child’s overall development, as well as onwards into adulthood.

Did we worry 10 years ago about children swapping between the roles of mummy and daddy? Of course not. However, those who have been paying attention to the insidious creep of gender ideology into schools must now fear the possibility of a meddling nursery teacher telling children they were ‘born in the wrong body’.

Unfortunately, this is a very real possibility. Recently, MSP Tess White, the Scottish Conservatives’ shadow equality minister, highlighted the correlation between the explosion of pupils in Scottish schools claiming to be transgender and the introduction of gender-identity into the curriculum almost 10 years ago. Since then, trans ideology has scarcely left a school or age group in Scotland untouched. Even nursery-age children are subjected to learning about gender ideology.

This is an appalling state of affairs. Children should be allowed to play creatively without overzealous teachers insisting this means they are questioning their gender. The mother that emailed me is undoubtedly part of a swiftly growing group of parents who are worried sick their children will be influenced by this ideology. With all the worries of the modern world, this is a shocking additional anxiety for parents.

I advised this mother to first look at the nursery school’s website. Does it contain any references to encouraging children to, for instance, express their gender identity? Or anything about being attached to programmes like the Stonewall Diversity Champions scheme? This would be a major red flag to what she is potentially up against.

Next, she should ask for a meeting with the nursery. I suggested she arm herself with something very positive to say to the nursery teacher about the nursery. For example, that her child says how much she loves X, Y or Z there. Then she should say something like: ‘My child loves creative play and as often as not says she wants to play the “daddy” as well as the “mummy”. I think that’s fun, but I wanted to check your policy on so-called gender identity.’

Depending on the replies this mother gets, I advised that she should clearly state that she does not want ‘gender identity’ to be discussed with her daughter.

It might seem daunting for parents to confront a nursery teacher in this way. I ask you, though, would it not be more daunting to have your child arrive home confused about her sex?

Ultimately, as Einstein noted, ‘Logic will get you from A to B, but imagination will get you everywhere’. We cannot have gender ideologues turning a child’s creativity into confusion about their sex. We simply want our children to be free to play.

Pam Spurr is an award-winning radio presenter, sex and relationship advisor, author and life coach. Find Pam at www.drpam.co.uk and on X @drpamspurr